oh, and i was reminded of words read long ago, today, but i bit through the hunger-pangs and resisted.
at the base of a passion-less disposition lies an immense fear of disappointment (rejection?). and that very base remains strengthened, and lined in place, with one's ego. after all, if you love one thing, or anyone, and face an off-hand dismissal, what truly makes one crumble? is it not the bruised ego and wounded pride which speaks, then?
but i doubt the meat played a bigger role than the voluntary alienation.
WHAT IS THERE TO DO WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE YOU'VE DONE IT ALL?
but you (I) haven't. me theory is that i've exhausted the supply of distractions afforded to me. it's always two steps back to square one.
oh, and you: get married already so we can move on with our lives.
wassup chengez? it's been good hanging, my furry, feline friend.
the word, is brooding.